What is depression..??

What is depression really?

Is there one concrete definition,

or has the meaning loosened as our generation has continued it's downhill descent? To me, depression is simply my life.

I'm not suicidal. I'm not a cutter.

I don't hate the world.

I don't dress completely in black.

I'm just sad.

I've been sad for what feels like my entire life,

but that's not true.

I was happy once and I can vaguely remember what it felt like,

but I can't touch it. I can't get that happiness back,

I don't know how. That's what depression is to me,

knowing what happiness is,

but never being able to touch it,

to feel it.

Everything that ever caused a tear to trickle down my cheek,

I run away and hide from it.

But now,

everything is unwinding and finding its way back towards me.

And I don't know what to do.

I just know that pain I felt so long ago,

it's hurting ten time more.

Everyone sees who I appear to be

but only a few know the real me,

They only see what I choose to show there's

so much behind my smile they just don't know.

I always be by your side..

I don't have the words to make you feel better,

but I do have the arms to hug you,

I have the ears to listen to whatever you want to talk about,

and I have a heart thats aching to see you smile again.

Why I love you..??

Why I love you is a hard question to answer.

I love you because you care for me like no one else I know.

I love the way I feel in your arms, so safe from dangers in the world.

I love your eyes,

so hypnotic and mesmerizing,

beautiful to gaze into, and yet never revealing everything to me.

I can explain every way that I love you

because thats in possible.

But I can say I love you because you are you.

Pain

I wish I really can tell you how I really feel about you

My feelings toward you..
I really want to tell you that I love you..

But

I'm afraid.. I'm afraid being rejected..

I'm afraid you won't accept me,,

and then everything change

We won't be close to each other like before..

I'm afraid you won't talk to me anymore..

I'm afraid you gonna ignore me..

Every time I see you..

I wish that I can tell you that I love you..

This feeling killing me softly..

Sometimes I feel like there's no hope for me to be with you..

Sometimes I feel like want to give up..

It's hurt so much..

Someone Special..

I want someone to share my secrets with,

someone to talk to late at night when I can't sleep,

someone who feels comfortable around my family,

someone to comfort me when I'm scared,

to hold me when I'm sad,

someone who doesn't need to say that she loves me for me to know its true.

Sometimes..

Sometimes I feel like no one cares.

Sometimes I feel like no one is there.

Sometimes I want to kill myself.

Sometimes I think I need some help.

Sometimes I feel like I'm alone.

Sometimes I'm in an empty zone.

Sometimes I feel like I'm not alive.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm deprived.

Sometimes I think the world should end.

Sometimes I think I have no friends.

Sometimes I want to make them see that,

sometimes I wish I wasn't me...

My song.. - My heart belongs to you..

You,,I want right now,,

You,,I need right now,,

Now my heart beats for you,,

Now my heart belongs to you,,

I wanna be with you,,

Yeah.. I wanna be with you,,

Because I fallin' in love with you

Nothing I can do

I want you

Because I fallin' in love with you

And it's so beautiful

I love you

And yes I do

I love you~

do I look happy..??

This is me.. Do I look happy in this picture..??

Maybe yes maybe not..

But mostly,,people will think I'm happy..

Because I'm smiling..ahahahaha

But if you know me well..

Look into my eyes..

I am smiling but deep inside of me,,

I'm dying..

that's her..

Wait for the man who calls you beautiful instead of hot,

who calls you back when you hang up on him,

who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat,

or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the man who kisses your forehead,

who wants to show you off to the the world when you are in sweats,

who holds your hand in front of his friends,

who thinks you' re just as pretty without makeup on.

One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares

and how lucky he is to have you.

The one who turns to his friends and says,

that's her...

Love you..

'I love you' means

that I accept you for the person that you are,

and that I do not wish to change you into someone else.

It means that I will love you

and stand by you even through the worst of times.

It means loving you when you're in a bad mood

or too tired to do things I want to do.

It means loving you when you're down,

not just when you're fun to be with.

I love you means that I know your deepest secrets and

do not judge you for them,

asking in return only that you do not judge me for mine.

It means that I care enough to fight for what we have

and that I love you enough not to let go.

It means thinking of you,

dreaming of you, wanting

and needing you constantly,

hoping you feel the same way for me.

What is my problem..??

Do you want to know what my problem is?

I will tell you what my problem is,

I LOVE YOU

I love your name,

I love the way you look at me,

I love your gorgeous smile,

I love the way you walk,

I love your beautiful eyes,

I love what you look like when you are asleep,

I love the sound of your laugh,

to hear your voice fills my entire heart with an indescribable feeling.

I love the way I can be having the worst day of my life

and seeing you completely changes my mood.

I love how when you touch me I get weak

that is my problem...